WiP [Work in Progress]

Thoughts and ramblings of a Filipino author

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The Girl Who Everyone Wants To Marry, But No One Actually Dates

March 3, 2015 • Leave a Comment

I dunno, I think I am this type, too. And yeah… ouch.

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EJ the Heroine

March 3, 2015 • Leave a Comment

I may consider myself a full-time writer for Bookware Publishing Corp.’s My Special Valentine but I am also a freelancer, accepting offers for writing/editing/workshop/speaking engagements/media relations/corporate communication jobs from anyone who needs my professional services in those areas. My latest participation is with the creative team that put together Precious Hearts Romances‘ 25th Anniversary commemorative coffee table book titled 25 Most Precious. The book, launched last 28 February coinciding with PHR’s Grand Fans’ Day get-together, features twenty-five of PHR’s bestselling novelists throughout 25 years. I was contracted to be the technical editor and writer (for certain articles).

Working on the articles, I found it fun, and a little adventurous, to answer the same questionnaire filled out by the featured writers and I thought I would like to share my answers here. Some of the details herein are stuff that readers (and followers/stalkers of this blog) might already know about me, but anyway, here’s more about me.

* image from www.redbubble.com via Google Images

1. Personal Information and Family Background
Parents are both accountants. Dad Georgie graduated from a Management course from the University of the East, Mom Filomena graduated from Philippine College of Commerce (now PUP) in Commerce major in Accountancy. Both are now in the US as immigrants. Both worked there from 1999. My dad is retired now, laid off from work in 2013, mom has about 3 years more in the work force before she entertains thoughts of retiring.
I’m the older child, dalawa lang kami magkapatid. Glenn is turning 41 this June, married to Haidee, orgmate niya noon college at naging student pa. They have 2 kids: a boy, Karl, 13; and a girl, Natalie, 10. They live in Singapore now.
I also have 2 adopted brothers who are both priests. The older of the two, naging ‘ward’ ng nanay ko sa St. Paul, QC when he went there as an intern (nag-e-MA siya noon sa La Salle in Educational Management). Mom was then the school registrar. ‘Yung mas bata, a Franciscan from Cagayan Valley, tinulungan ng parents ko makatapos ng pagpapari.
I’m 42 as of this writing, studied elementary in Immaculate Heart of Mary College (near SM Centerpoint), high school in St. Paul College (hindi pa siya university noon), Quezon City, college at UP-Diliman, BS Tourism.
I sing, I dance, I drive a mean truck, I am a great cook…

2. Kailan mo naisipang magsulat at bakit?
Hindi ko actually naisipan magsulat. Pinagsulat ako dahil kasama iyon sa trabaho ko as a PR secretary sa trabahong kino-consider ko as my first real job. I was being trained to write articles which started out from me transcribing audio clips of interviews. Ang una kong tikim ng pagsusulat ng anything remotely like a love story was when BFF Queng (PHR’s Angel Bautista) would invite me to do wild mind writing with her. Sa kaniya ko rin nakuha iyong inspiration para makabuo ng tula kasi nabasa ko mga tula niya. Naisip ko noon, hindi naman profound pero maganda yung words. Presto! May tula ka na.
Iyong pagsusulat ng nobela, bunga yan ng pangangailangan ng additional income. Si Queng pa rin ang may hatak sa akin diyan. Pero in between the stint with transcriptions of celebrity/performer interviews and getting my novels published, ang naging linya ko talaga ay feature writing, business writing. Uminog sa pagiging marketing at public relations executive ang corporate career ko.
Sa totoo lang, prior to working on any kind of publish-worthy material, I thought my writing was not much more than a study in grammar, composition and vocabulary. They didn’t have any depth to them. I never really thought I could eventually learn the magic of integrating emotions with the words.

3. What inspires you to write?
Sabi nga ni Neil Gaiman (non-verbatim), you get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas everywhere. The difference is we writers recognize them more quickly or more frequently than most. This is true for me. Para siyang literal na bumbilyang bigla lang iilaw sa ibabaw ng ulo mo with matching ‘TING!’ sound. Conversations I hear/overhear, a photo, a song, a scene from a movie, book, television show, FB status, personal experiences, experiences ng iba. ‘Yan ang sources ko ng inspiration. Plus ‘yung prospect ng research. Masaya ‘yung marami ka natututunan na hindi mo matututunan kung hindi ka writer dahil mas receptive ka sa ideas because of your desire to present the facts straight – you go places kahit hindi ka umaalis ng bahay, you learn about other cultures and people, you learn about government, military, terrorism, espionage. Kaka-research ko, theoretically, marunong ako mag-construct ng bomba.
Hindi ko kaya, however, iyong parang may makikipag-usap sa akin purposefully to tell me their stories so I can make a novel out of them. Pwede siguro akong pumulot ng snippets pero mahirap for me ang gamitin bilang buong plot ang kwento sa akin. Or ‘yung mga tipong, pwede po ba akong maging heroine ng libro niyo. Best effort lang. No commitment. Maarte ako. Or rather, maarte ang characters ko. Namimili nga sila ng sarili nilang personality at trabaho, malamang mamili sila ng gusto nilang partner.

4. Style? Voice? As a writer
Hindi ako magaling sa drama so I steer clear of that. Nagkakataon lang kapag may naisulat akong nagpaiyak sa nagbasa. Gusto ko ng mga may kakaibang plot twist. Tipong posibleng ang iniisip ng reader ay… ganito ‘yan magtatapos… pero hahanapin ko ‘yung least common na resolution/conflict/peak para sa kwento ko. I like writing about military/action-romance. Scenes play out vividly in my head. Minsan nga ina-act out ko pa (mukha tuloy akong baliw sa bahay). Then I write the sequence.

5. If you are to go out of your comfort zone, anong susulatin mo?
Gusto ko makasulat ng erotica. Not that hindi ako nakakagawa ng mga kwentong may love scenes. Gusto ko lang subukan mga tipong pang-Ellora’s Cave o kaya Harlequin Blaze. Pwede rin sigurong futuristic. Alam ko mahihirapan ako doon kasi the future, to me, is techie. I’m not a techie person.

6. Sino sa mga characters na nasulat mo ang feeling mo ikaw na ikaw in terms of personality/physical attributes?
May ilan. Si Mikaela ng Kwentong Pag-Ibig Lang na isang writer. Si Kaye (na isinusulat ko pa lang) na nag-resign na marketing executive mula sa isang theater company at nagfu-full time writing. Si Pia ng Excuse Me, ‘Di Kita Type dahil kwento ko ‘yun at ng isang kaibigang namasyal sa Viet Nam. In a way, all my characters could be me, even the boys, because if they were not projections of some part of me, definitely my characters are who I wish I could be.

7. If you were a heroine in your novel, paano mo idedescribe ang sarili mo sa intro portion ng book?
Isang Plain Jane na insecure dahil nga plain jane siya. Pero dahil matalino, charming ngumiti, sweet ang boses kapag kumakanta, at magaling sa kusina, iyon ang mga plus points niya para mapansin siya ng isang romantic hero.

8. Ano sa palagay mo ang pinaka-memorable/sweetest na ginawa ng fan sa iyo?
‘Yung igawa ako ng fan page dahil sabi niya, napapanahon na. Salamat dito, Ivy Claire, Inday ko. ‘Yung gabing gabi na akong nakarating sa Iloilo dahil sa haba ng byahe mula Boracay. Handa na akong gumapang sa pagod, gutom na gutom na pero alam kong wala na akong mabibilhan ng pagkain. Nagprisinta siyang bilhan ako ng dinner. Thank you Novel Reina, sa pangangalaga. ‘Yung ipasyal at samahan akong mag-ikot sa Hong Kong – Alena, Danita, Shie, Joy, Imejoy, Ghie. ‘Yung kahit hindi ka pa nila nakikilala nang personal, pinapadalhan ka ng token gifts kahit pa galing abroad at mahal ang postage/courier cost. Kahit yung simpleng text o mensahe to let me know kung gaano sila natuwa, nagandahan, naiyak, sa gawa ko. Oh, and nakaka-flatter nang bongga iyong pag-agawan ng readers and heroes mo. It means you’ve made them fall in love with your guy. 

9. Ano pa ang pinapangrap mo bilang writer? Bilang tao?
• Bilang writer, gusto ko mag-venture into self-publishing pero English ang gagamitin kong medium para mas malawak ang reach. Pwedeng international. I want to be a Paulo Coelho. Or a Neil Gaiman. Or a Sherrilyn Kenyon. Or a Sharon Sala. Or Tom Clancy. Kahit posibleng hindi ko naman marating ang kalibre nila, but I will aim for something close. Gusto ko makasulat ng tipong medyo may philosophy at life-lessons. Tas gusto ko ng fantasy-suspense-gothic-romance pero based sa Filipino mythical creatures ang mga characters ko. Or pwede rin ako bumuo ng isang bagong mythological world complete with gods and goddesses and monsters. At saka suspense/action/military/espionage. Gusto ko rin makapag-publish ng non-fiction work. Something like a self-help book that features life lessons and philosophies I learned and tried my best to live by. Before those things happen, may simpleng pangarap ako sa realm ng Tagalog romance. Gusto kong makagawa ng napakagandang obra such that mga editor ko at mga kapwa ko manunulat ay hindi manghihinayang at mag-uunahan pang i-endorse sa mundo ng mga mambabasa na bilhin ang libro ko dahil hinding hindi nila pagsisisihan iyon.
• Bilang tao, magbyahe. Makarating sa US para makasama na ang parents ko. Magkaroon ng ranch. Or makapag-asawa ng nagmamay-ari ng isang ranch. Matuto mag-skydive, mag-deep sea diving, makapag-rapel sa bundok, makasakay ng C-130 at tumalon (skydive) na may ka-tandem na Navy SEAL. O kahit Marine o Airborne, pwede na. (Kinikilig ako sa idea.) Gusto ko mag-ampon legally ng kahit isang bata para maging anak ko kasi hindi na yata ako mabubuntis pa sa edad ko. Gusto ko ng alagang aso – Huskie or German Shepherd. Kung magiging mayaman ako, gusto ko ng isang malaking lote na pwede kong gawing ampunan ng mga ligaw na aso tsaka pusa.

10. Kung ‘di writer, anong ginagawa mo?
Baka slave ng corporate world. Or baka naman nag-aral at nagtapos na ako ng culinary arts at pwede akong chef sa isang luxury cruiser o sa isang 5-star hotel. Or I could have been a singer. Hindi necessarily nasa level ng sikat tulad nina Regine or Lea Salonga o kung sino pa man. Tamang lounge singer na regular na nakakapag-gig sa hotels both here and abroad.

11. Sa totoong buhay, romantic?
Yes, very. I like dinner and candlelight. Slow walks. Slow dances. Holding hands. Hugs. Pet names for each other. Footsies under the table. Mornings in bed. Watching stars habang nakahiga sa beach. Lovey dovey messages and phone calls. Chocolates and flowers. Pero mas gusto ko maregaluhan ng kotse o bahay at lupa.

12. Saan ang dream place mo to live?
Kung saan may snow at English ang salita ng mga tao kahit hindi iyon ang native language nila. Basta marunong mag-English. Okay lang din ako sa maaraw at malapit sa dagat tulad ng Santorini sa Greece o kaya sa Positano sa Italy. Maybe London or New York para pwede akong manood ng West End/Broadway plays. Hehe… Pero I think I would prefer a more rural setting than an urban one. Tama na ang fast-paced living. Gusto ko ng tahimik.

13. How do you set your writing mood?
Nagbabasa, nakikipag-story conference, nakikinig ng music, nanonood ng tv, katahimikan. Kaya gusto ko sa gabi. Plus komportable na ang temperature kapag gabi. Hirap ako mag-concentrate kapag naiinitan ako masyado.
Pero talaga, importante sa akin ‘yung may nachichika bilang sounding board ko.

Ayan. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing down my answers. I will not say I dream of becoming part of PHR’s roster but I just simply want to be able to continue to write and write well. I hope, and I pray, I can continue to do so.

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Never ever (also known as The Art of Expressing Opinions)

February 17, 2015 • Leave a Comment

Disclaimer: I am writing this entry for myself as a reminder. If it hits you, then… you deserve to be hit. [evil cackle with thunder and lightning in the background]

It’s funny how we all have this tendency to cram each other into tight little definitive boxes of what we perceive as right or wrong, what’s acceptable or no, or what the more intelligent choice is over the insipid one. Worse, we picture whoever does not share our views as someone who is necessarily against us personally, and is out to ruin us as they voice out their opinions and therefore, they deserve to be hated and labeled as enemies.

* image from www.quotesdump.com via Google Images

The ideal scenario should have been to confine the discussion to the issue at hand and no crossing over to the personal plane. While it is important to assert one’s point if we truly believe in them, it should never be to a point where we start impressing our own choices on others and depriving them of making choices of their own no matter how pathetic or how wrong that might be in our assessment.

I will come clean and admit that I am guilty of being a pompous bitch especially during my younger years when I was liable to allow my emotions to run away with me faster than I could control it. But hey, I am not perfect (I hope I don’t sound like I’m making that an excuse) but I also know that as much as possible, I do put in effort to respect others and their different views by not attacking the person, just his point of view. A personal attack is just such an immature and stupid move and it shows one has no real conviction (or may not, perhaps, really understand what the issue is?) for whatever it is he stands for.

Let me cite for example this crazy way we’ve all come to be so dissatisfied with PNoy and his ‘daang matuwid’ that seems to have flown out the window. Lately, citizens have resorted to calling him Abnoy, Panot, Noytard, and whatever other perceived derogatory label anyone could think of by way of criticism. Well, surprise, peeps. Those labels are not part of the issue. And please, leave our mentally-challenged brethren alone. What they are is never a label for insults. At any rate, PNoy can’t help if his hair is thinning and that, definitely, has nothing to do with his personality or his convictions. Let us focus on his incompetence, his insensitivity, his bias, his blatant disregard for propriety, his stupidity. Panot certainly does not figure in the picture.

Anyway… Onward to why I wrote this entry in the first place… This is for me, right?

To show respect for people’s opinions and their space…

  1. I should never ever accuse anyone of not knowing what they are talking about or that they understand it all wrong unless I am able to logically and intelligently argue every point why I believe them all to be wrong. Otherwise, I know I stand to lose my own credibility by being so immature as to insist on my side of the story without sound facts to back me up.
  2. I should never ever assume that they are not as well versed in a particular issue as I am, or that they do not know anything because information can be sourced from just about anywhere, not just from the material I have and am familiar with. What is the internet good for except to research, right? Oh, yeah… apparently, there are millions of Facebook users who do not know they are on the internet. *sigh*
  3. I should never ever underestimate the person who is putting across an opinion as someone who knows zilch especially if I have never known the person to make stupid remarks or interjections. There are unspoken and unwritten nuances I may not have inferred from what I read or heard and it would be unjust of me to simply jump to conclusions and label the person incompetent. If I had any respect for him/her, I should be able to recognize that he/she is not in the habit of forming and offering opinions just to spite others.
  4. Lastly, and probably the most important… I should never, NEVER EVER tell anyone to zip it just because they have an opinion that’s different from mine especially since they’ve never told me to shut it either. I can do no less in terms of affording them respect than to just leave them to express themselves freely just as much as I am enjoying the freedom to express myself as well.

We all have our own truths. We all have our own personal views. Live and let live, people. Paix a tous!

P.S.

Something to do with self-preservation, I need to remind myself to choose wisely who to pick a fight with. I am not willing to be cannon fodder for a bigshot bigmouth wordsmith who can pass of as Miriam Defensor-Santiago’s protege when I only have bitchiness to fight with. In cases such as these, I should be the one to zip it because I don’t want and I don’t need to embarrass myself. *wink*

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Dear Bookware / My Special Valentine

February 14, 2015 • Leave a Comment

* image from flickr.com via Google Images

 

To more years of success with love stories na mas kilig pa sa kahit anong asim kilig… Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for being part of my life.

Cheers!

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When You’re A (not-so-young-anymore) Single Woman on Valentine’s Day

February 12, 2015 • Leave a Comment

* image from animal-kid.com via Google Images

I’m 42 years old. I’ve been in very few relationships in my life and only one serious one. I mean serious as in we lasted more than just a few weeks and we were accepted in each other’s families and there were times we actually talked about marriage and having a family and spending forever with each other. We were a couple for five years, more or less, counting periods within the five years we were apart, almost giving up but somehow wanting to try and rebuild. While we were successful getting back on our feet during those times of uncertainty, in the end, we’ve obviously had to part ways. Permanently. I have not been with anyone since.

I tried to get myself back on the market, so to speak, finding myself single and available once again. Enthusiastic friends tried to introduce me to potential suitors (and hopefully, the next boyfriend) but somehow, I just could not bring myself to open up and be more receptive and participative in the search for a new boyfriend. It may have been because of extreme fear of further rejection. You know, once bitten, twice shy. Or it could have been a case of the timing being just too soon.

Well, ‘too soon’ was obliviated by busyness at work. Days turned into weeks, and months turned into several years and before I knew it, I was nearing my 40s. And since I was still single and not even dating anyone seriously, I started to panic that life would pass me by. How do I hope to get that happy ever after I wanted for myself? The hubby who goes to work and supports our family, the kids who I will help get ready for school… The kind of ideal, dreamy family life scenario we have been taught in our youth to look forward to apart from a career.

The neurosis affected everything – my appreciation for life and happiness and contentment – although most likely, the tension from work greatly contributed to my unrest, too. And then I left my job, and went to live far away from everyone I know and everything that I was familiar with. Where I went, wherever it was, I found myself. I found out I can be alone and yet still be content.

It had been a decade since those moments of dread but hey, look! Life didn’t pass me by. Yes, I have remained single. No, I have not shunned marriage from my life. I have just learned to accept and be happy with what I have. Me. And I’m not such a bad choice for a life partner for me.

So what has this rambling to do with Valentine’s?

Before my serious relationship, I had always been single on Valentine’s day. When ex-BF and I were still together, we did not really celebrate Valentine’s day the way most couples do – go out on a date, with romantic candlelit dinners, a bouquet of flowers, chocolates, a stuffed toy or a piece of jewellery, then perhaps go dancing or see a movie, capping the date with a night (or just three hours) of romping in a dimly lit room. We simply stayed home, watched whatever’s on TV, gorged on takeout food or something he or I cooked. He said he didn’t believe in setting a special day just to celebrate love. Everyday should be a day to celebrate love. I sort of dug that, although I also believed he was a cheapskate and only avoided spending money. Har har! After five years, I was back to being alone on the day for lovers.

I may not have experienced trauma that’s as bad as what the next single person suffered from. I was extremely hurt when we broke up. I was even bitter for a while and every time Valentine’s or Christmas came, I curled my lip and muttered bah, humbug! But living alone all these years… I don’t know about you, but my ex was right. Valentine’s is an overrated red letter day on our calendar. Oh, I won’t berate couples who revel in it even if I do roll my eyes at how enterprises take advantage of the whole thing just to make extra money. Exorbitant prices for a bunch of flowers? No seats at my favorite resto when I’m very hungry? C’mon!

* image from www.pinterest.com via Google Images

But singles, really… There isn’t anything to be bitter about. There’s nothing wrong with being alone. Or celebrating Valentine’s with friends and family. We single women need to learn to enjoy ourselves. Although it would be nice to have that special someone, a significant other is not a prerequisite to being complete. Don’t wait until you’re 42 to realize this.

Happy heart’s day everyone!

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